February 08, 2005Beardy, beardySo Charles Clarke has put his foot down. Positively no more immigrants - unless they have useful skills. Surely this is tantamount to saying that we'll take advantage of other countries having better education systems than us? - a strange thing for a Home Secretary to say, and stranger still for one who was until recently Education Secretary. Beardy beardy, Comments
Well, I think it sounds jolly sensible. But I would extend the policy to include the deportation of British people who do not have useful skills. Bye bye, Jimmy Carr! Posted by: James Lark at February 8, 2005 04:13 PMEek! Bye-bye academics like me!!!!! It's a good thing you're not in charge of anything important, like the country. Posted by: Mary at February 8, 2005 06:33 PMAh...hadn't thought of that. I imagine actor/writer/musician/comedian/bohemians would not be regarded as that useful either. Unless they were doing data entry or something. Posted by: James Lark at February 9, 2005 02:06 PMIf data entry counts as useful, then I get to stay. :-) But at least you'd be entertaining on those cold nights around the camp fire (this is the metaphorical camp fire around which the whole of humanity huddles). The best I could manage might be to make a mini-Stonehenge reconstruction using the matches. Posted by: Mary at February 9, 2005 05:09 PMWow! could you really do that? if you threw in a few matchstick druids as well, you could be a success at parties for ever. Parties that i was at anyway. Posted by: Susie at February 10, 2005 11:10 AMDruids are DEFINITELY useful Susie. They do all that housework and they never get tired or need feeding because they're made of metal, and some of them are REALLY clever like R2D2 and help you defeat evil empires, but even the useless ones are funny and camp like C3PO. Posted by: James Lark at February 10, 2005 11:15 AMSusie, it's an inner circle secret, but one I can reveal to you now seeing as no-one is really paying attention. All archaeologists can make mini-Stonehenge reconstructions, and not only that, we can make them out of anything at all: matchsticks, paperclips, pens, people... And, in fact, it's not just Stonehenge. Once on a dig in Sicily we made a Machu Pichu http://www.lukemastin.com/diary/photos_peru/cusco_machu3.jpg reconstruction using only our sweaty, work-hardened bodies. Much hilarity, I can assure you. Another time at Easter in Portugal we took the shiny tin-foil wrappers from our chocolate eggs and made a replica Agamemnon mask http://www.flycapers.com/tours/voyages/2004/2004Transit/images/mask.jpg using our trench leader's face as a mould. Worth every penny of government money, wouldn't you agree. Posted by: Mary at February 11, 2005 11:46 AMIf you can make a Machu Pichu with only your sweaty bodies then you should consider doing a sweaty-bodied physical theatre stage version of "The Mysterious Cities of Gold". You could make a golden condor out of chocolate egg wrappers. Posted by: James Lark at February 11, 2005 02:14 PMWell count me in for that. I might even be persuaded to produce it. Posted by: James Aylett at February 11, 2005 02:34 PM |
